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2015年12月大学英语四级作文评析(一)
贾从永
Directions: For this part, you are allowed 30 minutes to write an essay commenting on the saying “Never go out there to see what happens, go out there to make something happen.” You can cite examples to illustrate the importance of being creative rather than mere onlookers in life. You should write at least 120 words, no more than 180 words.
2015年12月的大学英语四级考试的作文属于阐述道理型。此类作文要求考生论证一句名言、谚语或俗语的正确性。本次所考的三道四级作文题说的都是一个处世之道。比如,上面这道题要求考生论证一句名言的正确性(Never go out there to see what happens, go out there to make something happen.)。这句话的意思是我们不能做生活的旁观者,而是要有所作为。
本文宜写成三个段落,第一段先引出这句名言,然后用通俗的语言解释一下。此为立论。第二段要论证这句名言的正确性。题目的写作指令(You can give one example or two to illustrate your point.)已经明确告诉了我们本题的论证方法 --- 举例论证。事实上,我们要论证一个抽象道理,最容易下笔的方式就是举出具体的例子。我们既可以举出人物做例子,也可以举出事情作为例子。比如,本文的第二段就可以以保护环境为例来论证采取积极行动的重要性。本文的第三段可以先用一句话总结全文,指出积极行动的重要性,然后建议读者要做积极的行动者,而不要做被动的旁观者。请看范文:
A wise man once remarked, “Never go out there to see what happens, go out there to make something happen.” His words tell us that we must act actively in order to bring about positive changes.
There is a lot of truth in this remark. A good illustration is environmental protection. Every one of us wants to see blue sky, breathe fresh air and eat healthy food. But all these will not come about automatically. We must do something to make the world better. For instance, we must use fewer disposable products, do more recycling and be more active in waste sorting. Similarly, we can never become
healthier by watching others take exercise. Nor can we acquire a new skill by idling around.
An ancient Chinese saying consulted us, “It is better to stand up and take actions than just to sit and talk.” Therefore let’s be a creative doer rather than a passive onlooker so as to change the world for the better. (164 words) 语言亮点借鉴:
1) bring about,带来,引起。
2) There is a lot of truth in this remark. 这句话很有道理。
3) A good illustration is environmental protection.一个恰当的例子是环境保护。A good illustration / example is ----,这是举例论证的一个常用说法。此处的good,意思是“恰当的,适当的”。 4) come about,发生。 5) waste sorting,垃圾分类。
6) Nor can we acquire a new skill by idling around.我们也不能靠无所事事就能学会一种新技能。idle around,无所事事。
7) An ancient Chinese saying consulted us, “It is better to stand up and take actions than just to sit and talk.”有一句中国的老话告诫我们,“与其坐而论道,不如起而行之。”
8) change the world for the better,把这个世界变得更加美好。