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一份奖学金使我得以上大学，这可是我社交圈子里极其难得的荣耀。不仅如此，它还让我能够穿行于为富人家的孩子打造的史上著名的大学殿堂里。就在这里，我生平头一次碰到女人告诉我说男人是有罪的，因为他们把地球上所有的欢乐和特权都据为己有。我被弄糊涂了，要求她们予以解释。什么特权？什么欢乐？我想到家乡大多数男人那种艰难严酷、伤痛累累的生活。人们所说的他们从妻子和女儿那里偷走的东西又能是些什么呢？难道是每周五天、每年十二个月，如此三四十年里挤缩在纺织厂狭小的空间里，或是在煤矿下挣扎着从岩石般坚硬的泥土中挖出最后一点煤的劳作的权力？战死疆场的权利？修缮屋顶上每条裂缝和围栏上每个断栏的权利？为一个遥远的城市某个富裕财团垒积钱钞的权利？在遭遇解雇或煤矿倒闭时感到既害怕又羞耻的权利？

In this alien world of the rich, I was slow to understand the deep grievances of women. This was because, as a boy, I had envied them. Before college, the only people I had ever known who were interested in art or music or literature, the only ones who ever seemed to enjoy a sense of ease were the mothers and daughters. What's more, they did not have to go to war. By comparison with the narrow, compartmentalized days of fathers, the comparatively lightweight work of mothers seemed expansive. They clipped coupons, went to see neighbors, or ran errands at school or at church. I saw their lives as through a telescope, all twinkling stars and shafts of light, missing the details that truly defined their days. No doubt, had I taken a more deductive look at their lives, I would have envied them less. I didn't see, then, what a prison a house could be, since houses seemed to me brighter, handsomer places than any factory. As such things were never spoken of, I did not realize how often women suffered from men's bullying. Even then I could see how exhausting it was for a mother to cater all day to the needs of young children. But, as a boy, if I had to choose between tending a baby and tending a machine, I think I would have chosen the baby.

So I was baffled when the women at college made a racket accusing me and my sex of having cornered the world's pleasures. They demanded to be emancipated from the bonds of sexism. I think my bafflement has been felt by other boys (and by girls as

well) who grew up in dirt-poor farm country, by the docks, in the shadows of factories - any place where the fates of men and women are symmetrically bleak and grim. When the women I met at college thought about the joys and privileges of men, they didn't see the sort of men I had known. These daughters of privileged, Republican men wanted to inherit their fathers' power and lordship over the world. They longed for a say over their future. But so did I. The difference between me and these daughters was that they saw me, because of my sex, as destined from birth to become like their fathers, and therefore as an enemy to their desires. But I knew better. I wasn't an enemy to their desires, in fact or in feeling. I was an ally in their rebellion. If I had known, then, how to tell them so, or how to be a mediator, would they have believed me? Would they have known?

在这样一个满是富人的陌生世界里，我在理解女人们深深的怨怒方面很是迟钝。这是因为，当我还是一个小男孩时，我就嫉妒过她们。在上大学之前，我所认识的唯一对艺术、音乐或文学有兴趣的人，唯一看上去能够享受一丝自在的一群人就是那些做母亲和女儿的人。而且，她们也不必去参加战争。与父亲们所遭受的狭隘的、封闭的日子相比，母亲们所承担的相对较轻的工作显得更加宽泛一些。她们剪用购物券，探访邻居，在学校或教堂跑跑腿。我仿佛是透过望远镜看到她们的生活，满是闪烁的星星和一缕缕光线，而漏掉了她们生活岁月的真实细节。毋庸置疑，如果我用更具理性的方式审视她们的生活，我就不会那么嫉妒她们了。可在那时，我实在看不出一幢房子能成为什么样的牢狱，因为房子在我看来比任何厂房都更亮堂、更体面。我也没有意识到女人是多么频繁地遭受男人的欺凌，因为这样的事情从未被提及过。即使在那时，我也能够看出一个母亲整日忙碌着应付年幼孩子们的需要是多么地辛苦。但是，作为男孩，如果我那时必须在照顾婴儿和照看机器之间作选择，我想我会选择照顾婴儿。

所以，当学校里的女性大吵大囔，谴责我和我所属的性别，说我们霸占着世间的欢乐时，我很困惑。她们要求从性别歧视的束缚中解放出来。我认为别的男孩（女孩也一样）也会有我这样的迷惑，只要他们成长于一贫如洗的农村，成长于码头边或工厂附近——成长于任何让男人和女人的命运同样苍白和严酷的地方。

当我在大学里遇到的那些女子们想到男人的享乐和特权时，她们并没有见过我以前认识的那些男人。这些特权阶层的、共和党男人的女儿们渴望继承她们父亲的权力和凌驾世界的贵族身份。她们渴望能对自己的未来拥有发言权。而我也渴望这样。我和这些女儿们之间的区别在于，她们看我时想到的是，我因为自己的性别而自出生起就注定可以成为像她们父亲那样的人，从而也是她们实现自己欲望的敌人。但我比她们更清楚，无论是事实上还是情感上，我都不是她们欲望的敌人。我是她们反抗行动的同盟者。如果那时我就知道如何把这些告诉她们，或如何在中间做一个调停人，她们会相信我吗？她们能够理解吗？